Reconnection.

Today was great. Caught up on some much needed sleep! Then I worked on the PCH and scrapbook a bit. (The PCH is super long and involves a lot of thought, so stick with me as I complain about it everyday!) I spent my morning/early afternoon making plans for the next few days. Tonight I went out with my friend Dave, tomorrow I am going to Sterling Heights for the night. My cousins Dan and Rachel live there and my cousin Mike's band has a gig over there tomorrow night we are all going to. Then Saturday I am hanging out with Sara.

After my plans were finally made, I started getting ready for tonight, then went to the leasing office and resigned my lease for another year. I have until July 16th to cancel it if I decide to move elsewhere. But in all honesty, I'm not so sure I see that happening. Then I went back to my apartment and finished getting ready.

Dave got here and we went out to London Grill and had some amazing food and conversation, then went to Shakespeare's for a bit. Funny story, at Shakespeare's these three girls came in and sat down next to me, well behind me because I was turned talking but you get the picture. Well Dave went to the bathroom and I overheard the girls saying that they needed to find a guy to buy them drinks because they didn't want to have to buy drinks all night. Right after Dave came back they started talking to the guy next to them, within like 2 minutes he bought them drinks. The two of us couldn't help but laugh at the situation. And at least one of the girls was engaged/married!

Dave and I knew each other from NCMC, the community college I went to up north and he recently moved to St. Joseph. So I forsee us hanging out more in the future. He is completely intrigued by my bucket list, as most people seem to be, so we talked about that and various other things. In talking to him I decided I'm going to make a list of all the places I want to go/things I want to do in Kalamazoo (as an add-on to the bucket list)! Dave said I should make a list of all the cool things I could be doing instead of making lists. Um yeah, I know I have a problem! =) But, it was a good time for sure. I still think he should come out next Wednesday to Wild Bull with us! (I added that just in case he decides to "stalk me" and read the blog!)

Then to finish off the night perfectly, Dennis had left me a couple IMs earlier in the night so I called him and talked to him for a bit. It's so weird with him not being in school and not being online all the time anymore. A bad weird, we used to talk for hours a day, but he's never on and I'm forever tempted to permanently close AIM so it doesn't disappoint me. Haha.

Ok. Picture time:

Day 39 (04.30.09):
cheers.

Day 39:
my bangs need to get a bit longer so they are controllable.

♥ Sara

"I would not exchange my leisure hours for all the wealth in the world."
-Comte de Mirabeau

#33 AND #94 - Completed.

33. ride a mechanical bull.

94. give a random guy my number.

Two in one night, go me!! =) Both will be discussed in detail later in the post!

This morning I got up and did some cleaning. Watched a few movies. The random movie selector makes me laugh. I watched "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days," followed by "Identity," followed by "Shrek the Third." If you have seen or heard of all three of those movies you will understand why I laughed. I also worked on my scrapbook some. It was suggested that I print off these blogs and keep them in there as well in case I ever close this down. So I started that, reorganized the scrapbook some, and worked on the PCH. I ran out of ink and paper, so I decided running errands would be necessary today.

I got my shower, but first facebook messaged Katie to ask if she would go to Wild Bull with me. And she obviously said yes. So I got ready and ran my errands. I paid my rent. Then I went to Hallmark, Dad's birthday is Sunday, Mother's day is the following Sunday, Dennis' birthday is the following Sunday and I have a few weddings coming up this summer, so I needed some cards. I also am going to have to do some shopping soon. Ugh. Shopping for gifts can be such a pain in the butt. I absolutely love giving gifts and sending cards though, one of my favorite things to do. Deciding on Dennis' gift was remarkably easy to do though, and I don't have to have Dad's until Mother's day. Then I went to Office Max and got my toner. Got home just in time to change and get ready to go out.

I went and picked up Katie and we went to Wild Bull. Tonight is college night and ladies ride the bull for free. Hell yes. No cover before eleven for ladies either. I think Wednesdays at Wild Bull might become our summertime tradition. After much persuasion from me and the guy sitting by us, Katie finally rode the bull. Prior to doing so she said "it's just not something I would do." So I told her I was going to bring some crazy in her life and she better get used to it. I rode the bull (obviously). Three times!! I absolutely loved it!! There was a guy that sat next to us and chatted us up throughout the night. In fact, Katie rode the bull with him (see the picture of the day). Well finally I realized I didn't even know his name, so I asked Katie if she did and she said no, let's just call him Chris. And I said well I'll ask. And he said ask what? So I asked him what his name was. Get this, his name was Kris. Katie did not know this and was just as shocked as we were that she guessed it right. So anyhow he wanted to give me his number so we could call if we ever went out to Wild Bull again. I figured I might as well give him mine and knock it off my list. So I did. Don't worry ladies, I won't be dating him. He was just cool to hang out with at the bar. That's as far as that goes. =)

I am cutting this post short, I could totally go on and on about the bull riding, but I'm tired and I'm thinking tomorrow might be another late night. =)

So for the pictures:

Day 38 (04.29.09):
Katie and our random guy, Kris, on the bull.

Day 38:
black is back. as is the lip ring, I missed the damn thing even though I complained about it and wanted my stud back when I had to wear it.

♥ Sara

"We should be taught not to wait for inspiration to start a thing. Action always generates inspiration. Inspiration seldom generates action."
-Frank Tibolt

#15 - Completed.

15. go to a movie. alone.

That is right! I did one of the easiest, yet most difficult tasks on my list. It was easy because I mean going to a movie doesn't cost a lot of money, it isn't difficult to do, and it's definitely enjoyable. But going alone was scary and intimidating. I don't know. I'll explain it when I get to it.

I spent my morning/early afternoon watching movies, working on my Personal Case History (# 105 on the list), and editing pictures. So, ya'll know how I am super-indecisive. Well I spent nearly a half hour staring at my movie rack trying to decide what to watch when finally I came up with a brilliant (or so I think) plan. I put all my movies into an Excel spreadsheet and then used a number generator to choose a number and watched the movie corresponding with that number. I think I might do the same thing for all my favorite restaurants! ;)

Then at 4ish, Brendan called to let me know grades were up, once the feeling of throwing up subsided I went and looked. I got two As, two BAs, and a DC. UGH. I knew it was coming. As, some of you knew I have been freaking out about failing that class for a while now. It was my own fault, I turned in assignments late, and then she decided not to accept them. Ugh.

So I had told Dennis I would call him immediately to let him know how it turned out. He has been my rock through my freakouts about this (just as I have been his through his first year of law school). I called him, about in tears to tell him I failed and won't be receiving one of my degrees. Then, throught the course of our conversation I thought about the fact that not all classes do you have to have a C to pass. So I started looking, I tore apart my bedroom looking for the course catalog and for my major slip. The major slip said nothing about course requirements, and I couldn't find the catalog. Then my genius bestest tells me to call the college. After calling three different people I finally got someone to answer my question. Calling Dennis to tell him I passed was the highlight of my day. And telling him that I still graduate with honors, with a 3.5 GPA was great. It made me laugh that we ended up with the same GPA at the end of our undergrad careers, and that made him happy because he couldn't handle me having a higher one! ;) I'm not sure which of the two of us was happier that I passed though. He told me I should go out and celebrate, and I said I didn't have anyone to go out and celebrate with, which lead me to thinking and completing my next bucket list task. Excellent idea. I really don't know what I would do without him! Anyways, I talked to him a bit longer, then went back to my PCH and pictures.

Later my mom called and I told her the whole story. Yeah, I wasn't going to tell her I almost failed a class but I have this thing with keeping stuff from her, in that I cannot do it. So I told her the whole story. She wasn't mad about my grade. Wasn't mad that I could have not passed. Nope, she was mad that I didn't tell her sooner so she could be there to support me. Wow. Really? I have amazing parents (have I told ya'll that?!?).

Then I got a shower and got ready. I decided I was going to complete a bucket list item today. So I went to see Fighting at the Kalamazoo 10, alone. It was such a strange feeling. I felt like everyone was looking at me and judging me for being alone. (And I wasn't dressed like a freak for once so it wasn't that!) But it was a also a very liberating feeling. I realized today that the last time I went out on a date was January 19th. That just made me sick, so I considered tonight my date with myself. =) Anyhow I absolutely loved the feeling at the end of the movie, the feeling that I could do anything alone. I already knew this but it reaffirmed it. I really like my new-found independence and feel as though I might need it for a while. The movie itself was ok. It wasn't anything spectacular, but I would watch it again if someone asked. Wouldn't buy it though.

Oh and I wanted to point out: 350 visitors in 10 days. WOW. =)

Ok, time for the pictures:

Day 37 (04.28.09):
my ticket.

Day 37:
I don't know what my deal is with color lately!!

♥ Sara

“All alone!
Whether you like it or not,
alone is something you'll
be quite a lot.”
-Dr. Seuss

Sleep.

Today was spent catching up on sleep. Then I spent a couple hours job hunting. I am far from done and haven't actually sent my resume in anywhere, but I do have quite a few jobs saved that I will be applying for. I 'm excited. I don't know yet where I will end um for the next chapter of my life, or if I will stay here, but I'm still excited for it.

I'm not sure what to think of this nothing-to-do thing. I have a feeling I'm going to get bored real quick. My apartment has never been this clean for this long. I have found myself spending more time cleaning than I think is healthy, but I guess it can't be a bad thing.

I'm keeping this post short because I am exhausted and want to go to bed! So here are the pictures:

Day 36 (04.27.09):
the decorations on my door from yesterday.

Day 36:
yes, I am wearing a tie-dye shirt.

♥ Sara

"You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.
You're on your own.
And you know what you know.
You are the guy who'll decide where to go."
~Dr. Seuss

Party.

Yesterday was great! I didn't post last night because it was too late and I actually fell asleep on the couch watching a movie. But my day started out just as great as it ended.

I got up and made my breakfast and spent the next few hours cleaning and talking to some of my favorite people. I put away all my movies and some of my clothes, did dishes, and vacuumed for the fourth time in two days. Now that school is done and I won't find myself spending every waking moment doing homework (or saying I should be doing homework) my OCD issues can really shine through. UGH. So then I took a shower and got ready to go shopping with the girls. While I was waiting for them I made a sign and blew up a ton of balloons. (Maybe my picture of the day for tomorrow (well today now) will be of my door decorations. I forgot to take it yesterday so I can't use it with this blog, I really am a stickler with myself on this project.) Then the girls (Sarah and Katie) and I went shopping.

We got done shopping just in time for them to go home and change and come back for the party. In case you aren't an avid follower, the party was for Katie's 21st, which was actually last Sunday, but with finals week being last week most people weren't interested in giving up the Sunday before finals (especially with a lot of people having finals on Monday) to celebrate a 21st birthday!! We had quite a few people show up and had so much fun (well at least I did)!! Most everyone left and we decided to watch Death Race. I'm pretty sure I was asleep before the beginning credits finished. That's what happens when you don't sleep much for a week plus. . .then again I got up at 8 this morning. What is wrong with me?! =)

Ok, for the pictures:

Day 35 (04.26.09):
a close up of one of the roses my parents got me for graduation.
no photo editing done (aside from the crop to 4x6)

Day 35:
I need sleep, my lazy eye gets worse every day (one of my eyes doesn't open as far as the other, and the more tired I am the worse it is. . . ugh).

♥ Sara

"I am thankful for the mess to clean after a party because it means I have been surrounded by friends."
-Nancie J. Carmody

Liars.

OK, I'm doing something completely out of the ordinary. There will be two posts today. I have stuff I want to get off my chest and I don't want to bog down my 365 post with it. Plus I know my post tonight will be fun, whereas this one is serious.

I'm getting more fired up as I do more research and see more (or the lack there of). Girls, don't write what it is exactly on here. If he reads it, he will know who I am talking about without names being mentioned.

Pretty much what I have to say is don't fucking lie to me. Seriously! The worst thing someone could do to me is lie, especially when the truth will obviously come out.

I have been dealing with this for a bit now and I decided it wasn't going to bother me. But it is for some reason. It's the fact that I was lied to without reason. I would have understood the truth. I get it. I totally get it. And I'm happier because of what happened. But I CAN NOT stand being lied to and it makes me so mad that someone who I thought cared about me and who I thought I would be friends with for life (not necessarily close, but friends), would lie to me for no damn reason. I mean maybe he thought his stupid lie would bother me less than the truth. But he should have known the truth would come out and it did that I would be pissed. It's a million times worse than telling the truth ever could have been and I could easily chew his ass and write him out of my life forever without a second thought. And maybe eventually I will let this build to the point that I have to be confrontational because I will need to get it off my chest, then again maybe writing this will be enough.

I try not to slip names in when it's a bad thing, but in this case it is quite difficult. I want to call him out for the lying asshole he is in the worst way. Oh well.

Ok, I'm done ranting. Back to my prep for Katie's 21st tonight!!!!!!!!!!!! =) So excited for that!!
♥ Sara

"Dare to be true: nothing can need a lie: A fault, which needs it most, grows two thereby."
-George Herbert

Graduation.

#9. Get my Bachelors.

I graduated today!! AHH!! I didn't particularly want to walk, but my parents wanted me to and since they paid for me to go through school, I figured I owed it to them to let them see me walk across that stage. The ceremony was ok, long and boring, but aren't all graduations long and boring?

After graduation we took some pictures and then went out to Olive Garden for dinner. Then we came back to my place and I did some last minute organizing and took a nap until Dennis got here. My parents stuck around so they could meet him and then they headed home. Dan (my cousin, the one who was going to be my MOH) was working over here and so he came to Kalamazoo and had dinner with Dennis and I. We went out to Roadhouse, and I bought dinner. . . man I have never seen two boys throw a fit like those two did!!

After dinner we came back to my place and hung out for a bit. Dennis and I decided to try the ouija board out, but someone *ahem* Dennis *ahem* wasn't taking it seriously at all and instead decided to scare the crap out of me by yelling and grabbing my hands. OMG, I about died, so did Dan. Haha. Then we sat around and talked and watched some YouTube videos (some were much dumber than others) until Dan went back to his hotel. Dennis hung out here with me for a bit, talking and watching stuff on the Zodiac killer (we are both really interested in the case) before he had to take off to head home.

Overall, I had an excellent day! After all, I got to see all three of my favorite men in one day. Can't get a whole lot better than that!

On a sidenote, my blog hit 250 hits tonight! HOLY CATS! I expected maybe 50 in a week, not 250! Wow. . . =)

For the pictures:

Day 34 (04.25.09):
a dandelion at the college.

Day 34:
I graduated!

♥ Sara

"Graduation is only a concept. In real life every day you graduate. Graduation is a process that goes on until the last day of your life. If you can grasp that, you'll make a difference."
-Arie Pencovici

Get-Together.

I have some of the greatest people ever as friends.

I spent today cleaning, baking and worrying. I had to clean my apartment because I had my "I'm Graduating / End of the Semester / Life is Great Get-Together" today. It finally looks presentable! I was baking for the same reason. I made two kinds of cupcakes, double decker confetti brownies, a no-bake strawberry cheesecake and two ice cream cakes! (I have plenty left over for Katie's party Sunday!) And I was worrying that I wouldn't get it all done in time and because Dennis had his final final for his first year of law school today, and worrying is what I do. But I am certain he will do great! I just worry because I can!

But I got everything all done before people got here, which was great! So we hung out and played hold'em (the Sara(h)'s lost and Dad took David out in the end) and Rockband. I had a ton of fun and it was nice for my parents to finally connect real people with the people from my stories.

Sorry today's post didn't have more to it but I am exhausted and I have to be up at 7 am for graduation! Then Dennis will be coming over, my parents will be leaving, we might be having dinner with Dan, if not, or after, we will just be hanging out! I'm so excited for tomorrow! All of it!!! =)

Day 33 (04.24.09):
the rest of "Three Sara(h)s and a Katie"

Day 33:
notice the shirt! =)

♥ Sara

"Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same."
-Flavia Weedn

Survivor.

Wow, I'm exhausted! My parents came in today, and I attempted (FAIL) to clean my apartment before they got here. I also ran a ton of errands: got my glasses from Katie & Sarah's, picked up tickets for graduation, sold back books, cashed a check, and mailed out some books I sold. I got back to my apartment just as they were getting off 131 and I was STARVING so I begged for food, and got my way of course! We went out to I-Hop for dinner. Then we came back to my apartment. I made a grocery list for the stuff I need for desserts and snacks tomorrow and went shopping.

Then we watched Survivor. I know, the show is old and getting kinda redundant but it's our thing. Dad and I have not missed one episode yet. It's insane considering this is season EIGHTEEN!!! We have had to tape episodes, and in later years watch some online, but we always watch them and always call one another. The rare times (lately) that we get to watch it together is quite special to us. It will be a tradition for us until the show is canceled. Then maybe we will find a new show to make our tradition.

So the plan for the rest of tonight is cleaning, possibly starting my preparation for food for tomorrow, maybe not. I really could go to sleep right now. Tomorrow will be a late night post, or maybe I won't post until Saturday morning.

Oh and please vote in my poll!! I am really trying to figure out what to do with this hair of mine!

Now, for the photos:

Day 32 (04.23.09):
my parents tickets for my graduation.

Day 32:
me.

♥ Sara

“Tradition is an explanation for acting without thinking.”
-Grace McGarvie

Done.

Today was my last day! I am done. All my papers are handed in, all my exams have been taken, all my classes have been sat through. Wow. Just wow. It's all so surreal yet. I mean, can it really be that I am done? I have worked so long and so hard to get to this point, yet I'm really no where near as excited as I feel I should be. Maybe it has to do with my lack of sleep, or the fact that I'm not feeling the greatest, or maybe it's my old-self shining through and my fear of the unknown has returned. Whatever it is I hope it changes! I want to be excited about this!!!

My day was so long and crazy. I woke up this morning with the worst migraine I have ever had in my life. I could not function whatsoever. It was AWFUL. So I got up took some Excedrin Tension Headache, drank a glass of water, kicked all the animals out of my room and went back to bed, head under the covers and pillows over my ears (the sounds of the cars leaving just made it explode).

It eventually went away and I got ready for my last class ever. Which, since it was just presentations, wasn't all that exciting and certainly wasn't difficult. I talked to my professor after and thanked her for all she had done for me over the past year (she was one of my incompletes from the passing out business so I have spent quite a bit of time with her). Also I told her the story about the prof at MSU and my looks (see 'Dr. Adams' post for the story) and she was utterly amazed. She said that she has learned in her years of teaching to never judge a book by its cover and said that I'm a textbook example of that. She actually said that conservatives need more people like me on their side. (I laughed at that, since I seem to be a rare breed.) And she proceeded to tell me that she thought my lip ring is cute and she thought this was my natural hair color, and ended it with I shouldn't change my looks for anyone or any political job. (She's a public policy professor.) It really made me feel good.

Then I went to the library. I had a paper that was due a couple days ago that I hadn't gotten around to getting done yet. So I decided the best way to get it done would be to lock myself in the library until it was finished. Five hours later I emerged victorious. The only bad part was that I had SlimFast for breakfast and that was it. I got out at 9. AH! So Brendan and I had made plans to hang out and I convinced him to go to Applebees so I could get some food and David joined us. We killed a couple hours there and I decided I needed to come home and go to bed as my parents will be here tomorrow and my apartment is no where near clean.

I guess I will think about relaxing Saturday? Maybe not til Monday! Haha! I'm still excited for this weekend though!! =)

For the pictures:

Day 31 (04.22.09):
Sam.
we talked and decided since both of his sisters made it in here recently he probably should as well.

Day 31:
me.

♥ Sara

"The dream begins with a teacher who believes in you, who tugs and pushes and leads you to the next plateau, sometimes poking you with a sharp stick called 'truth.'"
-Dan Rather

THIRTY!

Day 30! HOLY CATS!!! I can't believe it's been a month, and I can't believe how much has happened in that month.

This is going to be a short post as I am on my way out to my last undergrad class EVER! Then to the library to finish my last undergrad paper ever! Ahh!! Excited!!

Thank you to all of my readers, I know there are more of you than I know about! I posted a counter on my site and put a blocking cookie on my computer. It registers every visit as long it wasn't from the same computer in the last hour. I hit 150 hits last night around six. I put it on SATURDAY!! Holy cow, I had no idea that many people read this. I don't think I'm all that exciting. lol. So thank you for being interested, and please, feel free to leave comments!!! =)

Now for the pictures:

Day 30 (04.21.09):
Black Bear.
only Dad would get the significance of this. (He got her for me when I was two.)

Day 30:
taken way too late at night, hence why I have the sweatshirt back on. =)

♥ Sara

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”
-Dr. Seuss

Busy.

So, this posting the next morning thing isn't going to become a habit, I promise. I have just been really busy and so tired lately. Yesterday I worked on a paper most of the day, nothing too exciting. . .

I am REALLY REALLY REALLY looking forward to this weekend though. My last undergrad class ever is tomorrow!! :-S I'm so excited in some ways but I feel like I should be scared as well. I have attended college full time, year around (including summers) for SIX YEARS now. Makes it hard to think of life without it, but I'm so excited to see what's next for me.

Thursday my parents are coming here. So that means my rat's nest needs to be cleaned by then! UGH! I'm excited for them to come though, they have averaged about once a year since I moved here (minus the three weeks Dad lived with me) and I always enjoy it when they visit.

Friday I am having a "I'm graduating / End of the semester / Life is great" get together at my place. I'll be making desserts and various snacks and having my friends over. I think that will be a lot of fun, especially since my parents haven't met any of my friends down here and they can see where my craziness comes from. (My dad is typically out of control!)

Saturday morning I graduate!!!!! Ah! Exciting! Then we will hang out for a bit, get some food and they are heading home.

Dennis should be here either Friday night or Saturday (he hasn't told me when for sure yet) to celebrate with me (I graduate, he's still alive after his first year of law school). I'm really excited for that since we see each other not-often-enough.

And then Sunday night is Katie's 21st birthday party at my place! Looking forward to that as well! What a busy weekend though!! =)

So MONDAY, I will be sleeping, all day. Haha.

Day 29 (04.20.09):
Kallie in the bathtub.
she spends a lot of time in the tub, weird kitty.

Day 29:
I really like the use of the mirror, will probably do that again one day when I care about my looks.

♥ Sara

“All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.”
-Anatole France

Happy Birthday Katie!

I'm going to apologize ahead of time for being boring or for any grammatical errors. I am dead tired. Sorry I didn't post yesterday, but I did take my pics, so consider this yesterday's post! AH DAY 28! Four weeks ago today (well yesterday) I started this journey! Wow. So much has happened! =)

Yesterday I got up bright and early to start on my homework. I finished 4 papers and 3 exams yesterday! I have one paper I forgot about due today, not a big deal. But because of all that I didn't get a nap in yesterday. =(

Last night Katie, Carolyn and I went out for Katie's 21st. Holy cats, we had fun! First, we spent a good 45 minutes looking for an open bar. SERIOUSLY!?!? We went to 5 losers before we finally ended up at Wayside, which was dead, but that's ok. The night was a blast! After the bar we went to Mennas and got Dubs (YUM!) and Sweetwaters so Katie could get her buy 1/2 dozen get a 1/2 dozen birthday donuts. Then we went back to her place. It was an all around good time, but I didn't go to sleep until after 5 am, and was up at 8. So as soon as this is posted it's naptime! Maybe I will expand on our adventures later, if I feel like it! =)

For the pictures:

Day 28 (04.19.09):
shooting pool at Wayside.

Day 28:
yes. Katie was trying to give me bunny ears.

♥ Sara

"Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest."
-Larry Lorenzoni

24 hours.

So within 24-hours I will be all done with my schoolwork. ALL DONE! I am so excited, as of right now I have 3 exams and 3 papers due. I will have 2 and 2 due by the time I go to bed! And I have til tomorrow at 8 to get it all done because I am going out with Katie for her 21st at that point and don't intend on doing any more before midnight, which is my last due date.

Today was not exciting, nothing worth talking about. I spent most of my day not really doing anything. Trying to do homework but I am exhausted and my mind is racing a million miles a second. Plus I didn't feel so well today, I think it's just being over-tired.

My picture looks like crap, I showered today but that's the extent of trying to look good I did. No makeup, AT ALL. So here they are:

Day 27 (04.18.09):
the candles currently burning in my bedroom.
yes, one is named monkey farts (banana-ish).

Day 27:
me, sans makeup. yeah, mom is on the phone.

♥ Sara

“The difference between school and life? In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.”

-Tom Bodett

Friend(s).

Oh, life. It's amazing how crazy mine is. I wonder if it will ever calm down. I have learned so much about myself and life in the past 3+ months. (It was 3 months ago yesterday that I called off the engagement.) And in that three months my life has changed so much, I have changed so much. It's unreal. (Today was a very reflective day, can you tell? And most of what I reflected on I can't, or won't, share here.) But here is what I can share, I have changed oh-so-much, and they are big changes and I would love to share them with you!
1. I had to have a plan, like a multiple-years plan.
--> I don't even know what I am doing in a week!
2. I overanalyzed everything. Caused big problems.
---> I am trying to remember what overanalyzing was.
3. I freaked out about everything, I was a stressed out mess.
---> I don't care about much. People, that's it.
4. My biggest fear was being alone.
---> All I need are my friends and family. Being alone is kinda nice.
5. I wouldn't leave Michigan and was mad that Jeff would.
---> I'm seriously thinking about DC.
6. I wanted to go to grad school more than anything.
---> Not so sure about that now.
I'm sure there are more but those are the ones off the top of my head. The only constants in my life right now are my friends (oh and family, but that's a given). The SFL group, my WB girls, Dennis (you get your own listing for being my bestest, even though I don't think you read this!) and a handful of others, are all amazing. I love you all.

It's ironic because tonight I was talking with my bestest. Quite often when we are talking and something significant is going on the question "what would I do without you?" comes out of one of us. Tonight it was him. Well usually something along the lines of "be lost" or "fail" or "die" would be one of the answers (the first being the most common, we agree then laugh at it) but tonight I said "I don't want to think about it, I'm not going anywhere." Now that doesn't mean that I'm not ever leaving the exact geographic position I am in, but it means I'm not letting him out of my life anytime soon. I have been through a lot in the last almost two years and there is one person who has been there through it all. And by ALL, I mean ALL. He gets the good and the bad and is typically the first to find out about both. He is the one person who isn't afraid to tell me the truth, even if it offends me. Surprisingly, he has only offended me once (and that was just plain stupid on my part, but that's another story). If anyone else said the things to me that he does quite often, I would freak out on them, but for some reason he gets through to me and makes me realize I'm an idiot, or that I'm not an idiot, or that someone else is an idiot. I really would be completely lost without him, and I know I'm being a big softie right now, it comes with the combination of tiredness and the reflectiveness that was today. Ok, moving on. =)

Tonight was the Potty-Mouth Pizza Party at Sarah and Katie's apartment. They have a swear jar and they used it to buy pizza for everyone who was an offender. (One night there cost me $2.25, go me!) It was great. I absolutely love those girls and really enjoyed my time out tonight. Then I came home and took an exam. Tomorrow is going to be homework filled. Woo hoo. . . ugh. But I want to get it all, and I mean ALL, done tomorrow so I don't have to worry about it on Sunday since I am going out with Katie for her 21st.

Now for the pictures, let's see if ya'll can figure out what's up with the self-photo:

Day 26 (04.17.09):
I don't know that I could live without these two things.

Day 26:
=)

♥ Sara

"The friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you."
-Elbert Hubbard, The Notebook, 1927

"There is magic in long-distance friendships. They let you relate to other human beings in a way that goes beyond being physically together and is often more profound."
-Diana Cortes

"One doesn't know, till one is a bit at odds with the world, how much one's friends who believe in one rather generously, mean to one."
-D.H. Lawrence

Yay for too many quotes and not being able to choose one.

Dr. Adams.

Today was rather eventful, yet I feel like I got nothing done!

I finished my paper and handed it in, FINALLY. Then I went shopping (grocery and general household items). After shopping I completed my scrapbook through day 20! Then I got ready for tonight.

Tonight I went to MSU to hear Dr. Mike Adams speak and took Katie and David along with me. He is a conservative professor at UNC-Wilmington and a columnist at Townhall. At one point not too long ago, he was a liberal athiest. I've seen him speak three times now. The first time was in Hillsdale and we went out to dinner with him after (three of us from WMU and two from Hillsdale). The second time, he came to Kalamazoo in November and I was in charge of getting him frm the airport, taking him to the event, taking him to dinner after the event, to the other airport to try and get his luggage (which the airline sent to the first airport, 45 minutes away, idiots.), to his hotel, picked him up for breakfast, ate breakfast with him, then took him to the airport. So we had plenty of time to chat in that time (this will make sense later in the story, I promise). If you have never heard of him you really should check him out here, if you are a liberal or feminist you will most likely be offended, but that's cool. =) Oh and fair warning he's a satirist.

His speech was great. We got there a few minutes late because someone missed the exit *cough* David *cough*, and he decided to stop his speech mid sentence and announce that we (well I, and the people with me) were there. And asked for a round of applause for us coming all the way out there (it's like an hour and a half) *shakes head*.

After the speech, while waiting to talk to him, this guy (the chairman of the Conservative Faculty and Staff group who put the event on) came up and started talking to us. Asked where we were from and which college we went to. Then he said are you conservative, liberal, libertarian? I immediately blurt out conservative (or maybe I said very conservative, whatever), Katie hesitates and I don't think she ever answered the question (She's a one-issue girl.), and David says libertarian. The guy proceeds to tell me that I threw him off, he thought I was a liberal because of my lip ring. Um yes, I am a liberal, therefore hating everything Mike Adams says, yet I drove three-hours round trip to see him. Sounds about right. Later, when we were talking to Dr. Adams that guy or another professor asked if I listened to hard metal rock. I laughed and said no. I listen mainly to country. I thought the guy was going to die of a heartattack right there. Then I proceed to tell him I have precious feet tattooed on me and I volunteer(ed, and will again soon) at a pregnancy care center. Talk about shock when he asked "You're pro-life?" Um. Once again, nope, just thought it would be fun to tattoo and opposing view on my body. Some people. But David tried telling me I imagine people judging me, that they probably don't really do it. Proof that they do, right there.

Finally enough people cleared and we got to talk to Mike Adams and I caught him up on my life (graduation, no longer engaged, my break, grad school, etc.) and he asked me what my ideal job is, I told him what I tell everyone: I don't know. Then he asked if I had any interest in working for Students for Life of America. I said sure, why not? And he proceeded to tell me that he thinks I would be great for it, wants to help me get a job there and will contact me with more information after contacting SFLA. Craziness. Oh I didn't mention, it would involve me moving to DC.

We left the speech with me pondering this and jabbering about potentially moving to DC and how crazy that would be since out of high school that's where I wanted to go, but got too scared and didn't do it. I was accepted to American University, but turned it down.

And since I was in East Lansing I was so disappointed that I wasn't going to get to see Dennis, we rarely get to see each other and I was right there, but I know that he's super-stressed out right now. (He's in his first year, second semester of law school and his finals begin on Saturday.) So I understood. But I figured I would give it one more shot (or three calls, haha). I called him and whined about wanting to see him and told him he could afford a half hour break. And after more whining and begging he agreed to come out for a little bit! I was so excited! Made my week, for sure. The crazy part is that next weekend he's coming here to hang out and celebrate the fact that he made it though the semester and I graduated! (I failed to mention we haven't seen each other since my birthday in October, so this is insane seeing each other twice in a little over a week!)

Anyhow, we went to dinner and visited with him for a bit, then we came back to Kalamazoo. I dropped David and Katie off, came home to write this and post these pictures and I'm headed to bed. I'll be sleeping by 1:30 am! Woohoo!! Tomorrow is going to be insane so I need some sleep!

For the pictures:

Day 25 (04.16.09):

Bridget. she hates it when I leave her alone most of the day.

Day 25:
contemplating life and things you can't even imagine.

♥ Sara

"A friend is one of the nicest things you can have, and one of the best things you can be."
-Douglas Pagels

Tired.

So tonight I will be very short winded. I am exhausted and didn't do anything too exciting today. Spent my day cleaning and doing homework, went to the CR meeting and then hung out with David for a bit. I can think of a couple things I wouldn't mind blogging about but I am far too tired to write anything long.

I will leave you with David's rendition of what my blog should say today:
April 15th: Taxes suck. I'm tired. Here's my picture and a quote. Leave a Comment.

Haha.
In light of tax day, David sent me this video to watch. And I found it hilarious so I am sharing it with you!


For real here's the pictures:

Day 23 (04.15.09):
after the attempted break in a few months ago I bought myself a bat that sits next to my bed, this would be my bat.

Day 23:
in my bedroom!
yes it's finally clean!

♥ Sara

"If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep."
-Will Rogers

Stay.

So I complete one task and add three. Haley posted her bucket list and I am stealing three of hers. And in doing so I realized I added another one to my list a couple weeks ago, but forgot to add it on here.
108. learn to decorate cakes.
109. learn to drive a manual.
110. send a postcard to Postsecret.
111. serve on a jury.

The crazy part about the ones added to the list was I pulled out the bucket list to hand-write them in and saw the cake one and knew that I hadn't shared it with ya'll. Ok, that's not the crazy part. The crazy part is that my friend Sara called today and asked me to make her wedding cake for her. Ah! I said yes because I would absolutely love to do it, so sometime between now and June 20th I need to figure out how to decorate a cake and make it look good. She said she just wants something simple, so that's good. And my mom used to decorate cakes so she has everything I would need and some books for me to use to learn. Anyhow, if you are in the Kalamazoo area there's a good chance that you will be offered cake sometime in the next couple months since I will be testing my skills a few times.

Today was long. I worked on my paper [read: sat at the computer messing around online and adding a little bit at a time] most of the day. I had it about three-quarters of the way done and got up to go get a shower only to come back to the computer with a black screen. It had went into hibernation. Then it rebooted. Yeah, I lost over half of what I had done. I discovered this about 45 minutes before class, no time to fix it. So I have to finish my paper and hand it in tomorrow. UGH.

I had my second to last Teaching FLE class tonight, I can't believe I only have three classes left in undergrad and I can't wait to be done!

After class I went to David's for a bit before the SFL meeting. If for some reason I don't stay in Kalamazoo, tonight would have been my last SFL meeting ever. (*insert tears here*) I absolutely love the people in the group and they are many of the reasons I want to stay here. (*fingers crossed that I find a great job here*) But the meeting was great and Katie and Sarah made me a graduation cake, along with awards for everyone that made us all laugh. They are great! =)

For the pictures:

Day 023 (04.14.09):
my friends Sarah and Katie and the cake they made for me. =)

Day 023:
David doesn't like this because it's "too emo," glad to see he's already realizing I don't listen well.

♥ Sara

"I have friends in overalls whose friendship I would not swap for the favor of the kings of the world."
-Thomas A. Edison

#106 - Completed.

106. kiss in the rain.

So, I went to bed shortly after finishing the blog last night and set my alarm for 5, thinking I would sleep a few hours, get up, write my paper and if I had extra time sleep some more. Well my mom woke me up at quarter to eight. My phone died and the alarm never went off. So my paper did not get done this morning. I flew (and I mean flew) from IR to Kalamazoo, only to make it 2 minutes after class started, not bad considering that was only a 4 hour 5 minute trip and that included stopping for gas, driving to my apartment, dropping the animals off, driving to school, finding a parking spot and actually walking to class.

I gave my presentation today though. I felt totally unprepared and read over my notes in the car on the way down here. I figured I was going to bomb it and look like a complete idiot. I actually ended up doing pretty well, the prof said I got a 93 out of a 100 on it. Works for me! =) And I am handing my paper in tomorrow with a 5 point penalty. Not bad either.

After class I started cleaning my apartment some, since someone thinks they might want to see it at some point (like now!), and then I ran to Meijer to pick up my days 11-20 photos. Then I went to David's and hung out with him for a bit. And by a bit I mean I just got home. Haha. Glad I don't have anything to do tomorrow until 6 pm! Well I have to write that paper, but that shouldn't be a problem. And I have to do some cleaning since he thinks he's coming over here tomorrow. =)

But on our way out (He walks me to my car when I leave his place, I don't like bragging about him here because he reads it and I'm afraid his head might explode if I brag him up too much, but ya'll know how nice that is!) he looked outside told me that it looked like I was going to be able to cross something off the list. It was raining! =) We both agreed it would have been much better if it was a warmer rain, but it was great anyhow. Perfect ending to what started out as a horrible day and kept getting better as time went on.

So . . . for the photos:

Day 22 (04.13.09):
well this is how you do homework on the road.
yes, I am driving with my toes at a speed that I will not tell here because my parents read this! =)

Day 22:
yet another in-the-car photo.

♥ Sara

"A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous."
-Ingrid Bergman

Rules.

First things first:

Happy Easter!! Happy 40th Anniversary Mom and Dad!!

So, up until almost midnight this was the worst Easter thus far in my life. I had two papers due today and another due tomorrow. I went to bed just before 2 and got up at 4, worked for 2 hours on homework, went back to bed for an hour and a half, got up for a few hours. Worked my butt off in hopes of getting back home tonight, I was exhausted so I laid down for another 45 minutes or so. Got my papers done, but I didn't make it home. =( It was actually probably for the best because I most likely would have gotten even less sleep and even less stuff done.

As you probably already know I had decided after Ben and I split that I was going to stay single for awhile, maybe casually date, but I wasn't going to let myself get into another relationship for quite some time. Three and a half weeks is some time, right? I swear I only make rules for myself so I can break them. I cannot think of a single thing I have said "never" or "always" or "absolutely not" or "not for ____ (time)" that I actually stuck to. Haha. Go me! Anyhow as you probably already figured out from this insane paragraph I am in a relationship. He knows my sordid history (well most of it, still have to fill him in on some, but he knows the worst parts of it) and he reads my crazy rambling on here, and somehow is still interested in me. =)

So it looks like I will be pulling another crazy sleep night to get my paper done by the time I have to leave in the morning. Ugh. I am so over all of this! And tomorrow I have that presentation. After that, I will be all done with coursework for 2 of my 5 classes. Then I have a small assignment Tuesday, aw hell let's take a peek at my week. This will be fun.
Monday: paper and presentation due. hanging out with David in the evening.
Tuesday: small assignment due. SFL last meeting of the semester =( (at Bilbos =) ).
Wednesday: class. CR meeting (yeah, I am going to those again, don't know if I mentioned that before, that's where I met David, he's the new chairman)
Thursday: small paper due. going to MSU to see Mike Adams speak.
Friday: exam. big paper due. potty mouth pizza party.
Saturday or Sunday night: taking Katie out for her 21st!
Sunday: 3 exams, 3 papers due (I was wrong on the due date in my previous listing, not every prof is the devil and makes shit due on Easter!)

Yep. Busy week! But I am so excited for it!! I graduate in 13 days!!!!!

Now for the pictures, fair warning, I threw mascara on just before I took them, I'm not even dressed, just a tank and pj pants. Totally forgot about it, but they were taken before midnight!!=)

Day 21 (04.12.09):
not my easterbasket, but some of the stuff from my basket in a spare one.

Day 21:
not a fan but couldn't skip today.

♥ Sara

“Rules are mostly made to be broken and are too often for the lazy to hide behind.”
-Douglas MacArthur

Eggs.

Last night I didn't go to sleep until after 430 am. UGH. Then I got up at 10 because my dad was cooking breakfast, ate and visited with him for a bit and went back to bed at 11. I woke up again at almost 3. Did I mention the kids were here for the night? Yeah, I was out.

Then I got up and got ready and took the kids home and colored eggs with them and my brother at their house. He had to go to TC for a gig that the band he manages had. So I spent my evening hanging out with my sister-in-law. I thoroughly enjoyed my evening with her, but I realized about 8 that I had to get home and get some homework done as well as color the eggs my parents had here for me to do. Yes, I am 21 and still color eggs. I will probably be 41 and still coloring eggs!! So my dad and I had fun coloring (well I colored he took pictures).

Now I am working on homework, well taking a quick break to get this published for today. Tomorrow, by midnight, I have to have a minimum of 16 pages written. And Monday I have that stupid presentation and the paper that goes along with it due. Ah fuck. (My new fave phrase.) Anyone want to bet whether I get it done or get any sleep tomorrow night? Oh and I have to find 4.5 hours to get back to Kalamazoo between now and Monday at 2 as well.

Want to know a secret though? I still don't care. The anxiety thing lasted like a day. Ahhhhh! Oh well.

So for the pictures:

Day20 (04.11.09):
my easter eggs.

Day 20:
dad suggested taking it from the other side.
I guess my right-handedness shows.

I can NOT believe it has been 20 days since I started this project!! It seems like just yesterday, then again in some cases it seems like it was forever ago when I think about it. So excited to print tomorrow (it will actually most likely be Monday since I have so much due) and put together the next 5 pages in the scrapbook! (I print every 10 days.)

♥ Sara

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."
- Steve Jobs

Exhausted.

My day was so eventful, and I am exhausted. But I am committed to keeping this stupid thing (the photos and the blog) up to date.

This morning I did some homework and Dad decided he was going to go get a haircut. Well then he asks me to go with him and I initially said no because I didn't want to do anything until I had to head to Jason and Shawnia's house (brother and sister in law). But he begged and so finally I said yes. He said ok, good, bring your camera.

We went to town and he got his hair cut and we got some stuff from Wal-Mart (mom gave us a list). Then we went to Aloha (the State Park) and spent probably an hour just taking pictures and hanging out. For those of you who don't know, I absolutely love my dad to pieces. More than I can express, so I thoroughly enjoyed our photography outing. Also, for those of you who didn't know, in my year of staying at my parents' and taking bullshit classes because I didn't like LSSU, my dad and I took a photography class together. Our professor hated us. Ya'll know how I am, well my dad is 10 times worse. We would joke around during class and I'm pretty sure Dad made fun of him while he could hear. Yeah, goodtimes!

I got back to my parents' just in time to fix my makeup real quick and leave again. My sister-in-law turned 30 today and my brother threw her a surprise birthday party. And he pulled it off. She was very surprised. So I spent my entire night there, got back here about an hour ago and am editing my pictures to post! But after taking almost 100 pictures today, making a decision is quite difficult!! I chose the ones that meant the most to me, the others will be put on facebook tomorrow. We had a blast, played on the playground equipment, just walked and talked, and I climbed a tree for the second time ever in my life, until dad told me to get down because he didn't want mom to hear an ambulance call for a 21 year old who fell out of a tree. haha. But here are the final choices:

Day 19 (04.10.09):
the shadow of dad taking a picture of him and I.

Day 19:
yes I was on the merry-go-round.
yes he was pushing me.
yes I got dizzy.

♥ Sara

"My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believes in me."
- Jim Valvano

Stripper?

Today I had to come up to my parents' house. I had a dentist appointment at 430. I have to wear the retainer 24/7 for two more weeks. And he sanded down a tooth so they are all even on the bottom. They look lovely! I am so happy with it!

So I get home and one of my best friends from high school was here to get his taxes done. I hadn't seen him in probably three years. We just kinda drifted apart. So, I visited with him for a little bit. When I first walked in the door he said "wow, you have your lip pierced?"
And here is how the rest of convo went:
Me: Yep, and I have nine others.
Him: Wow.
Him: Comments about how much I have changed, the jet black hair, lip ring, and general darkness.
Me: Yep, just a little bit.
Him: Yeah, I always said you were going to grow out of your goodie two shoes stage and become a wild child.
Now I don't consider myself a "wild child" but it made me laugh just the same.
Later. . .
Him: You don't work at the vu do you? [the vu is a strip club]
Me: Fuck no!
Him: Well with that hair cut I didn't know.
Me: What? I have a stripper haircut?
Him: Yeah. Kinda.
Wow. WTF.
So that was an interesting conversation. I guess anti-my-looks week isn't over yet!

It's almost midnight and I am EXHAUSTED. I am seriously going to bed as soon as this is posted, and if i get my way I will sleep past noon. =)

Ok, for the photos, the only editing done on the first is the frame. It was gorgeous!!

Day 18 (04.09.09):
the view from the end of my parents' road.
yes, we still have ice up here.

Day 18:
taken while driving, along with about 100 other photos.
BORED!

♥ Sara

“Silly is you in a natural state, and serious is something you have to do until you can get silly again.”
-Mike Myers

Lucky.

If I had to choose one word to describe my day it would be LUCKY!

So you know that presentation that I still hadn't started when I wrote yesterday? Well I went to bed at 330ish and woke up at 630ish. Started working on the presentation at like 8. (I needed time to wake up.) The class I had to present for was at 2. Well I got the presentation all done and felt decent about it, not good, but decent. So I get to class and another person is presenting before me. While she was presenting I was having trouble keeping my eyes open and thinking that doing this on three hours sleep was an AWFUL idea.

She gets done and it's the moment I am dreading has come. My turn to present and I'm pretty sure I'm going to fall asleep during my own presentation. So, I go up and plug in my computer. Nothing. My professor tells me to restart it, that always works. Nothing. She restarts the projector system. Nothing. So she tells me to email it to her. Well my computer's wireless card is always disabled because of my internet through Alltel. So I have to wait for that. My professor says well, if you are getting frustrated you could just present on Monday, we have extra time available then for that. And I was all wishy-washy about it. I didn't want to get marked down for it, and then she tells me she wasn't going to mark me down. And one of the guys in the class said he would totally wait until Monday. And I agreed. So I didn't have to present today! How freaking lucky is that?!? (The funny part is I don't believe in a such thing as luck, but what I think about what everyone else considers luck is far to complicated for me to write tonight. I will do so another day. =) )

Since I got NO sleep I decided to come home and take a nap. I slept for almost 4 hours before I had to get up and get ready to go to the Roadhouse for the CR "meeting." I put meeting in quotations because I haven't heard any business discussed in the month I have been going to meetings. Then I went to David's and we hung out and watched Lucky Number Slevin. (If you haven't seen it do so now! One of my favorite movies ever.) And I just got home a bit ago, edited my pictures to post, wrote this and then I am headed to bed! I have the long drive home tomorrow, which I am not really looking forward to.

Also, a couple quick updates. 1) I don't know if I mentioned this before but I will not be attending classes for at least the first summer semester as I currently hate school. 2) I am going to be trying my hardest to stay in Kalamazoo for at least another year. I'm just not ready to leave, so if you hear about an amazing job here please pass the info on!! =) 3) Last, but not least, my plants seem to be ok!!! I know Bri was concerned, even if no one else was!

For the pictures. . . I only took one 365 and two self portraits, time was not on my side today.

Day 17 (04.08.09):
the plant that I thought I killed and Sam.
he wasn't supposed to be in the picture but he wouldn't listen. I like it!

Day 17:
you can totally tell I'm suffering from lack of sleep.

♥ Sara

"The feeling of sleepiness when you are not in bed, and can't get there, is the meanest feeling in the world."
-Edgar Watson Howe